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Actual Ads in a Newspaper


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1.) FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER. 8 years old. Hateful little dog. Bites

2.) FREE PUPPIES: 1/2 Cocker Spaniel, 1/2 sneaky neighbor's dog.

3.) FREE PUPPIES... Part German Shepherd, part stupid dog

4.) FREE GERMAN SHEPHERD 85 lbs. Neutered. Speaks German.

5.) FOUND DIRTY WHITE DOG. Looks like a rat .. been out awhile. Better be a reward.

6.) COWS, CALVES: NEVER BRED...Also 1 gay bull for sale.

7.) NORDIC TRACK: $300 hardly used, call Chubby

8.) GEORGIA PEACHES, California grown - 89 cents lb.

9.) JOINING NUDIST COLONY! Must sell washer and dryer $300

10.) WEDDING DRESS FOR SALE. WORN ONCE BY MISTAKE. Call Stephanie

AND THE BEST ONE...

11.) FOR SALE BY OWNER: Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica - 45

volumes. Excellent condition. $1,000 or best offer. No Longer needed,

got married last month. Wife knows everything !

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