MrT Posted July 27, 2007 Author Share Posted July 27, 2007 A newly-joined chemist asks his boss' What is the meaning of appraisal ? ' Boss : ' Do you know the meaning of resignation ? ' Chemist : ' Yes, I do. ' Boss : ' So let me make you understand what an appraisal is by comparing it with resignation. ' In an appraisal meeting they will speak only about your weakness, errors and failures. In a resignation meeting they will speak only about your strengths, past achievements and success. During an appraisal you may need to cry and beg for even a 5% pay hike. In a resignation meeting you can easily demand ( or get more without asking ) more than 50-60% pay-hike ! During an appraisal, they will deny promotion saying that you did not meet the expectation, you don't have leadership qualities, and that you had several drawbacks in reaching objective/goal. During resignation, they'll say you are the core member of the team; that you are the vision of the company, and so ' How can you go ? you have to take the project on your shoulders and lead your juniors to success. There is a 90% chance of not getting any significant incentives after appraisal. There is a 90% chance of getting an immediate pay-hike after you put in your resignation. Chemist :' Yes, boss, good enough. Now I know what to do. When you are about to do my appraisal, I will resign. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrT Posted August 2, 2007 Author Share Posted August 2, 2007 A new vacuum cleaner salesman knocked on the door on the first house of the street. A tall lady answered the door. Before she could speak, the enthusiastic salesman barged into the living room and opened a big black plastic bag and poured all the cow droppings onto the carpet. "Madam , if I could not clean this up with the use of this new powerful vacuum cleaner, I will EAT all this S...!" exclaimed the eager salesman. "Do you need chilli sauce or ketchup with that?" asked the lady. The bewildered salesman asked, "Why, madam? " "There's no electricity in the house..." said the lady MORAL: Gather All resources be4 working on any project...!! ! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrT Posted August 17, 2007 Author Share Posted August 17, 2007 An old man lived alone in Minnesota. He wanted to spade his potato garden, but it was very hard work. His only son, who would have helped him, was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and mentioned his situation. Dear Son, I am feeling pretty bad because it looks like I won't be able to plant my potato garden this year. I hate to miss doing the garden, because your mother always loved planting time. I'm just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. If you were here, all my troubles would be over. I know you would dig the plot for me, if you weren't in prison. Love, Dad ........ Shortly, the old man received this telegram: "For Heaven's sake, Dad, don't dig up the garden!! That's where I buried the GUNS!" At 4a.m. The next morning, a dozen FBI agents and local police officers showed up and dug up the entire garden without finding any guns. Confused, the old man wrote another note to his son telling him what happened, and asked him what to do next. His son's reply was: "Go ahead and plant your potatoes, Dad. It's the best I could do for you from here." ******** Moral Of the Story NO MATTER WHERE YOU ARE IN THE WORLD, IF YOU HAVE DECIDED TO DO SOMETHING DEEP FROM YOUR HEART, YOU CAN....... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eldmannen Posted August 17, 2007 Share Posted August 17, 2007 The son in prison story is just awesome. Clever. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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