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TexasFilly

Employee Christmas Party

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December 1st

TO: ALL EMPLOYEES

I'm happy to inform you that the company Christmas Party will take place on December 23rd at Luigi's Open Pit Barbecue. There will be lots of spiked eggnog and a small band playing traditional carols ... feel free to sing along. And don't be surprised if our CEO shows up dressed as Santa Claus to light the Christmas tree! Exchange of gifts among employees can be done at that time; however, no gift should be over $10.

Merry Christmas to you and your family.

Patty Lewis

Human Resources Director

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December 2nd

TO: ALL EMPLOYEES

In no way was yesterday's memo intended to exclude our Jewish employees.

We recognize that Hanukkah is an important holiday that often coincides with Christmas. So from now on we're calling this our "Holiday Party." The same policy applies to employees who are celebrating Kwanzaa at this time. There will be no Christmas tree and no Christmas carols sung.

Happy Holidays to you and your family.

Patty Lewis

Human Resources Director

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December 3rd

TO: ALL EMPLOYEES

Regarding the anonymous note I received from a member of Alcoholics Anonymous requesting a non-drinking table, I'm happy to accommodate this request, but, don't forget, if I put a sign on the table that reads, "AA Only," you won't be anonymous anymore. In addition, forget about the gifts

exchange-- no gifts will be allowed since the union members feel that $10 is too much money.

Patty Lewis

Human Researchers Director

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December 7th

TO: ALL EMPLOYEES

I've arranged for members of Overeaters Anonymous to sit farthest from the dessert buffet and pregnant women closest to the restrooms. Gays are allowed to sit with each other. Lesbians do not have to sit with the gay men; each will have their own table. Yes, there will be a flower arrangement for the gay men's table.

Happy now?

Patty Lewis

Human Racehorses Director

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December 9th

TO: ALL EMPLOYEES

People, people -- nothing sinister was intended by wanting our CEO to play Santa Claus! Even if the anagram of "Santa" does happen to be "Satan,"

there is no evil connotation to our own "little man in a red suit."

Patty Lewis

Human Ratraces

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December 10th

TO: ALL EMPLOYEES

Vegetarians -- I've had it with you people!! We're going to hold this party at Luigi's Open Pit whether you like it or not, you can just sit at the table farthest from the "grill of death," as you put it, and you'll get salad bar only, including hydroponic tomatoes. But, you know, tomatoes have feelings, too. They scream when you slice them. I've heard them scream. I'm hearing them right now... Ha!

I hope you all have a rotten holiday! Drive drunk and die, you hear me?

The b***h from Hell

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December 14th

TO: ALL EMPLOYEES

I'm sure I speak for all of us in wishing Patty Lewis a speedy recovery from her stress-related illness. I'll continue to forward your cards to her at the sanitarium. In the meantime, management has decide d to cancel our Holiday Party and give everyone the afternoon of the 23rd off with full pay.

Terri Bishop

Acting Human Resources Director

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They should just party and enjoy.  People can do what they want at the party.  Not that hard.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

You would THINK Tarun, but unfortunately that's not the way it is right now. And I'm pretty sure things are going to get worse, before they get better. It's really sad huh? :(

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At least we here at Lunarsoft.net know how to party and have fun!  :lol:

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Don't we just, imagine if we all got together in real life, it would be mad. :realmad:

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Don't we just, imagine if we all got together in real life, it would be mad. :realmad:

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

That would be so cool!!! I've met alot of people off the internet, still great friends. :lol:

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That would be so cool!!! I've met alot of people off the internet, still great friends. :realmad:

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Really?

That is so cool, the internet gets blamed for a lot of vices nowadays, but it must of made a huge difference to some peoples (real) lives.

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Really?

That is so cool, the internet gets blamed for a lot of vices nowadays, but it must of made a huge difference to some peoples (real) lives.

You always hear about the bad, but never the good.

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my best friend in L.A. met is wife in yahoo chat, they have been happily married for almost 5 years now...too bad she's the devil resurected in a female body. she put the ball and chain on my buddy soon after they were married, no more fishing trips with him after that.

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You always hear about the bad, but never the good.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Well that's how I met my now ex, but he met his next one on the internet. LOL There are a bunch of good ones out there. I just don't want a romance from the internet or anywhere anymore LOL

He was pretty much a good guy, just has no clue what commentment means. We're still good friends.

I opened my house up to a gal in PA and her son where her husband was hitting her etc and they moved into my home for a little over a year. Rent free and now is out on her own. It is still a GREAT relationship

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totally agree, can't satisfy anyone these days..

TexasFilly are those gay smilies dancing!!1111!!1!1 Tarun i'm deeply offended and they need to be removed from the forums!!1 waaaahhhh!!!! lolz...

god people need to just enjoy their life.. not complain about where other people sit, whats to eat, who drinks and who doesn't...

*if you didn't catch it.. i was being sarcastic about the smilies.. they can stay.. lolz*

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TexasFilly are those gay smilies dancing!!1111!!1!1 Tarun i'm deeply offended and they need to be removed from the forums!!1 waaaahhhh!!!! lolz...

:realmad:

(Running with the joke here!)

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thanks for a great laugh LOL!!

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

LOL you're welcome, glad I could make you smile at least

Kierma? I understand, but then there's Tarun ya know... I think he's human :realmad:

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we got turkeys from our company for christmas. big chickens really. we used to get a great christmas party as well, but since we got bought 3 years ago from a transnational corp, that came to an end. oh well, i can still get wasted on my own.

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