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Dumb People

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There are some dumb people out there, who ask some very dumb questions!!

I have three dogs and I was buying a large bag of Meaty Bites at Big W and standing in line at the check out.

The woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Meaty Bites Diet again, although I probably shouldn’t because I’d ended up in the hospital last time, but that I’d lost 20 kilos before I woke up in intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Meaty Bites and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry and that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.

I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a guy who was behind her.

Horrified, she asked if I’d ended up in the hospital in that condition because I had been poisoned. I told her no; it was because I’d been sitting in the street licking my balls and a car hit me.

I thought one guy was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard as he staggered out the door.

Stupid b***h... why else would I buy dog food??


Cheers :hello:

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Funny story! :hello:

You found it, or it actually happened to you? I assume it actually did happen.

But why refer to her as "b***h", was she in any way rude?

Or is it because she was female?

Maybe she wasn't the sharpest knife in the drawer, but what really counts is the heart...

Maybe she wasn't stupid, maybe she asked because it could have been that you bought dog food but didn't have a dog, you bought it for a friends dog or knew someone who had a dog, that you bought the food for.

Great story. It's awesome story, because it is almost plausible, there are tons of diets, and it often come new diets, often the diets are ridiculously stupid, and you can hear about stuff as "cake diet" or "hamburger diet", so actually, I wouldn't be surprised to hear about a dogfood diet. One time on YouTube, I saw about this guy who ate only monkeyfood. Think he did it for a week or so.

Maybe it was that she felt attracted to you, and wanted to start a conversation, so she started talking about something in context. She saw you buying dogfood, and tried to start the conversation with "hey, do you have?", and assume that you would reply yes, so that she could continue with "cool, me too, dogs are just lovely, I have a golden retriever, what do you have?", wait for your reply, "oh those are cute, oh by the way my name is Karen"...

Hilarious story. I wouldn't be able to pull of something like this, because I would be able to keep a straight face. I would probably burst into laugh, or it would be possible to tell that I wasn't serious by looking at me. The funniest jokes are people can say a joke, and keep a straight face.

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